Life is hard, let’s be honest. We all have our ups, we all have those happy moments we can all look back at and smile. But life can be pretty rocky, full of downs, depression, loneliness and isolation. At my old school, I felt alone for the longest time. Sure I had my sister, she is always going to be my friend, but having a family member be your only friend for the majority of your life is sad. It’s not like I could go up to her and tell her something exciting that happened this weekend, because she ALREADY knew. So life slowly started getting hard, as I think it does for a lot of high school students. It’s that awkward age where you’re close to driving and getting some freedoms (I still don’t have mine xD) and a time where you’re also called a ‘kid’. Suddenly responsibilities you never had are thrown at you and old friends leave without explanation, it’s hard. It really is. If I didn’t have Brianna I’m not sure how I would have gone through those tough few years.
But then I found music. It was a lovely thing to hear someone’s beautiful voice sing out EXACTLY how you feel. That, other than my sister and my religion, is what saved me through those times. So, here’s a list of people who really got me. I just wish I found them earlier in my life.
Fall Out Boy
I always thought I’d hate Fall Out Boy. Why? They just seemed to dark for me (?) I guess? I’m not sure because, honestly, they’re not that bad XD But when I was in 9th grade (I think) I found a Fall Out Boy CD at the library. It was their most recent, American Beauty/American Psycho album, the cover had really drawn me in. And since Light ‘Em Up was playing on the radio, and I kind of sort of liked it, I thought why not give them a try.
Then I did.
And I loved them.
Suddenly I had at least 5 albums to listen too, a billion (not really) music videos to watch and a ton of tears to come my way. Why? Because they were beautiful to me, they understood how I felt. And for that, I LOVE them.
Sure they could be dark but they weren’t the punk band I thought they were. They could sing songs that would lift me up and plus they’re really a bunch of geeky adults, lets be honest here xD
Then, shortly after I fell in LOVE with these guys I found ANOTHER great band…
My Chemical Romance
This is one of those bands I will sadly NEVER get to see live in concert, a band I will never get to meet together. It makes me sad that I jumped on the bandwagon a little too late. I love them a lot too.
Welcome to the Black Parade really got me into them. It was a beautiful song, an amazing music video with a great backstory. From what I remember, Gerard made this song into a story. One of the most important events in this guys life, was when his father took him to see a parade. So when he died it’s what took him to the afterlife, the Black Parade. It really touches me, and the lyrics touch me even more.
I’m just a man, I’m not a hero.
I love all their songs. I Am Not Okay, Teenagers, I Don’t Love You, The Ghost of You…but Famous Last Words I like a lot because of the lyrics.
I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world alone.
Those were the words I really needed to hear. I knew I wasn’t alone because I had an AMAZING family but…at school I was left alone. I tried talking to people but they’d just walk away and there I was sitting by myself, alone in every group project, alone at lunch when Brianna wasn’t there. ALONE and it destroyed me on days when I was sad. But like I said, I had a family to support me and these bands to pull me through it.
I hope one day I could meet one of them and give them a hug. I’m sure they hear it a lot but I want to tell them personally.
And then near the end it drops from the hardcoreness and gets softer and kind of romancey, Gerard then steals my heart xD but Frank is my faves, forever and ever ♥
He’s one of the few musicians (other than Pete Wentz, Patrick Stump and probably Gerard Way) I’ll fangirl over. LOOK AT HIM OH MY GOSH MY HEART, MY HEART ♥ Yeah…he’s my fave right now…
Another reason why I love them is that they’re also SUPER motivation in their quotes, especially Gerard.
Be whoever you are extremely loud. And be fearless when you do it.
The world is ugly, but you’re beautiful.
and I can’t forget to add a quote by Frank~
If you are true to yourself, you can never go wrong.
Another great thing about Frank xD
Since this post is SUPER long, I decided to skip a few bands and talk about one right now that really gets me. Andy Black. He’s the singer (I think) for Black Veil Brides. I could never get into their music but when I saw his album on Spotify, I decided to give it a try 🙂 and I ended up liking it a lot. My favorite song ended up being Homecoming King because I really related to it. He feels like the invisible person in school who never gets noticed and probably won’t ever be homecoming king. Since I didn’t go to prom (and I’m super bitter about my ‘friends’ planning to go without me. I thought we were friends. Guess not. See? Still bitter. Being left behind is the story of my life, I guess) I feel similar to he does. Plus he has an amazing, AMAZING voice that I could listen to all day…well they all do xD
Why Did I Write This?
Now you’re probably asking, ‘why OH WHY ANGELINA DID YOU WRITE THIS POST?’
First of all, I really wanted to write about music. My favorite music. But as I started writing this, I realized there was more to this post than I thought. Here’s the NEW reason I’m writing this~
Depression is hard.
When you’re surrounded by tables full of people and have nowhere to sit. When you have a group project to do but no one wants to work with you. When your friends talk about what they did with each other every weekend and they never invite you anywhere. It starts to weigh you down, to make you sad, to make you feel lonely. It makes you feel like nothing will ever save you. Nothing could possibly help you.
But…maybe things can.
Like I said, I had a great family who supported me. And through school I was lucky enough to have a loving sister to stick with me through the whole thing. But it wasn’t the same as having someone outside your family care about you. Since no one seemed to, or ever really did, I found music.
For me it was music that really saved me. It was Fall Out Boy who took away the tears I had, it was My Chemical Romance who told me everything was really going to be okay. They showed that people struggled but they survived. And if they survived than so could I.
Now, don’t just think music can be the only thing to help. A lot of people find happiness in other things, you have to find out what makes you happy. Because truth is nothing matters more than finding happiness (as long as it’s safe for everyone xD). Music can help, art, movies, band, teachers ANYONE. Heck, you can talk to me anytime I will be there for you. If you don’t want to talk about what is wrong, we don’t have to talk about that. We can talk books, movies, psychology, I don’t care what. I just want you to be happy.
Because no one deserves to feel alone. No one deserves to feel unhappy.
I just want to say, also I was NEVER suicidal through this. But some people are. You aren’t alone.